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Silver Belles by Revely
From: Revely
Date: Sat, 18 Dec 1999 19:49:57 GMT
Subject: NEW: Silver Belles (1/1) by Revely
Title: Silver Belles
Author: Revely
Email:
Classification: A Holiday Tale
Spoilers: No season 7 spoilers
Archive: Anywhere, just let me know.
Thanks: Loads of thanks to Barbara D, Jean, and Fialka, for gleefully received nitpicking. And thanks to Jill, for giving this a read-through during her sweeps season. <g>
~ ❄ ~
“Climb right in, dear,” called the blue-haired lady, leaning from the passenger side window of the passing car. “This is no night to be stranded.”
Scully rolled up her window as the other car pulled off the highway and coasted to a stop in front of her. For a moment she debated the intelligence of hitching a ride with strangers. She could always just wait for a highway patrol vehicle to notice her hazard lights, but it was dusk on Christmas Eve, and this was the only car she had seen on the highway in the fifteen minutes since her car had given up the ghost with a shudder and a wheeze. Scully glanced down at her disabled cellphone and then back up at the car in front of her. She was getting to be too suspicious, that’s all there was to it. For heaven’s sake, it was a long pink Lincoln Towncar with three little old ladies inside. Scully got out of her car, grabbed her overnight bag from the trunk and slammed it shut. She glanced down at the Lincoln’s license plate, just in case. It read “MREXMS.”
“Hell of a night to be stuck,” said the driver as Scully slid into the backseat behind her. Even with her overnight bag and another rear seat passenger, there was probably room for three more people, or, in the spirit of the season, maybe a dozen elves.
“Yes, it is. Thanks for stopping, I appreciate it,” Scully answered, looking around the spacious interior. The driver took a drag on her cigarette and blew the smoke toward the open window. In the half-light, Scully couldn’t make out anything but the top of her white head, which barely topped the headrest. In half a second, Scully had the three summed up: mid-eighties, if they were a day. Maybe older.
The woman in the passenger seat took off her seatbelt and maneuvered herself around. Her hair, which shone with the silvery-blue rinse particular to older women, didn’t budge from its perfectly constructed helmet as she moved. “Now, Merry, don’t ya even think about moving ‘til I’m buckled up again,” she threatened the driver as she stuck out a veiny hand for a shake.
Her gravelly voice took on a nicer tone when she directed her gaze toward Scully.
“Hi, honey, I’m Carol, and that’s Merry,” she said, pointing her head toward the driver, “and that there is Joy.”
For the first time, Scully turned to look at her seatmate. Of all the things the woman didn’t look, joyous would probably come first. She was old, although perhaps not quite so aged as her friends, and she smiled a watery smile at Scully around a lace handkerchief, which she sniffled into frequently. Scully had the strangest desire to reach out and pat the woman’s bony shoulder.
“Yeah, we know,” bellowed Carol, in her bullfrog voice, “Joy is miserable, I can’t sing worth a damn, and Merry is about as grouchy as they come. Welcome to our car, dear.”
Scully smiled. “And I’m Dana. Thanks for having me.”
Merry didn’t bother to wait for Carol to sit back down before she zoomed out onto the highway. Carol flew over sideways and hit the door. “Damnit, Merry,” she cursed, arranging her red dress which had ridden up to reveal her slip. Scully watched as Merry fiddled with the rearview mirror, winking at her in the reflection. She almost winked back.
“If you don’t mind, you can just drop me off at the nearest rest area or gas station. I can call for help from there.”
“Lord no, honey,” Carol said, pulling the armrests down so she could peek into the backseat. “Who in the world are you going to get to come fix your car on Christmas Eve? We can just take you right on home.”
“That’s nice of you, but I’m from D.C. I can get my partner to come get me. I tried to reach him but my battery must be dead,” Scully said, fishing her cell phone out of her pocket and cramming it into her overnight bag. It tumbled to the floor, spilling out her handcuffs and some latex gloves. Joy just stared at her, openmouthed, as she tucked everything back into her bag.
“Well, it’s real nice of your partner to come all this way to get you.
I guess ‘partner’ is a new way of saying, lover, huh?” Carol asked, with a shake of her head, as though she could hardly be expected to keep up with the modern slang.
“No, no. No, he’s my work partner. And he’s already here working on a case, so it’s no trouble.”
“A case?” Merry didn’t even bother to remove the cigarette from her lips when she spoke. Her white eyebrows formed two question marks on her forehead. Scully mentally kicked herself. She didn’t want to startle the women, but it seemed particularly rude not to answer.
“Nothing important,” she assured them. “A few toy store thefts.”
The words were hardly out of her mouth before the car swerved suddenly and Scully felt herself sliding over the leather upholstery and bumping up against Joy. Carol let out a high shriek in the front seat as they came within inches of the guardrail. With one violent jerk on the wheel, Merry pulled them back on the road. There was a moment of sickening silence before the driver spoke.
“Deer,” she muttered, gripping the wheel and puffing furiously on her cigarette.
Joy laughed nervously as Scully collected herself and retreated to her side of the car, wondering if she should offer to drive. It was getting dark, and from what she could tell, Merry could barely see over the steering wheel. The front of the car seemed to be traveling in another state, it was so far away.
Up front, Carol finally released the death-grip she’d put on the dashboard and settled back into her seat, throwing Merry a murderous look. Scully bit back a smile. There was something hilarious about seeing a frown that fierce come off the prunish face of a little old lady. All three of the women looked like Hallmark versions of grandmothers, Joy’s tears notwithstanding.
“So, dear, what did you say your last name was again?” Carol asked, keeping her gaze on the road in front of them.
“I didn’t actually, but it’s Scully.”
Carol nodded very slowly and turned to glare at the side of Merry’s head. Merry wiggled up in her seat a bit until she could see in her rearview mirror. After their last encounter, Scully wished she would keep her eyes on the road instead of the backseat.
“Toy stores, huh? Doesn’t sound like much to investigate to me.”
Scully smiled slightly and nodded. There was no way she was going to explain to these women that from all appearances the toys were simply disappearing off the shelves. The security cameras at five ‘Toyz 4 Totz’ stores in West Virginia showed nothing at all. One minute there was a shelf full of potential gifts, and the next time the camera panned to that aisle it was empty. This was the fourth consecutive year that the stores had reported such bizarre incidents, and this time, Mulder had decided they needed to make a daytrip to check it out. They had spent the morning questioning every employee of the five stores and come up with nothing. As the afternoon wore on, Scully had grown more restless, hoping they could be on the road before dark. It had surprised her when he handed her the keys to their car and sent her on her way, claiming he would rent a car for the drive home. He’d quietly wished her a Merry Christmas and then turned back to watch the surveillance video as she left, kicking herself for not having the nerve to ask him what his holiday plans were. He probably preferred to spend the break getting some work done, anyway.
“So did you find anything?” Merry asked.
“Nothing significant.”
All three women nodded to one another. Carol reached out and patted Merry’s arm. Their response bewildered Scully.
“And now you’re going home for the holiday,” Joy spoke at last. “That’s lovely.” She had a soft English accent that contrasted sharply with Merry’s clipped northern one and Carol’s distinctive Southern drawl. Scully wondered how three women from such different parts of the world came to be friends.
“Well, I hope so,” Scully answered.
“It’s so terribly important to be around your loved ones at Christmas,” Joy said, as tears began rolling down her wrinkled cheeks. Scully watched helplessly as the woman sniffled into her handkerchief.
While Scully smiled sympathetically and nodded, she wondered if Mulder would let her drive his rental back to D.C. or if he would mind taking her back himself.
She had a six a.m. roll call at her mother’s house, and if she wasn’t there, all hell would break loose.
“Oh, for Pete’s sake, Joy,” Carol said, fishing around in the glove compartment until she came up with a disposable box of tissues She flung into the backseat to land on Scully’s lap. “We told you a thousand times not to marry him, and this is exactly what you get for not listening to us.”
“I know,” Joy admitted, throwing Scully a grateful look when she handed her a tissue. “But I really thought it was forever.”
“Sentimental old biddy,” Merry muttered.
As far as Scully was concerned, Joy’s friends sure didn’t seem to be taking her heartbreak seriously. “Your first Christmas alone?” she asked kindly.
Joy nodded and blew her nose. “Yes. This is the worst time of year. It reminds me of what I’m missing.”
Scully thought of her own recent Christmas experiences and grimaced with understanding. In the past few years, her love for the holiday season had taken a depressing nosedive, veering dangerously close to an all out Bah-humbug attitude. She could just picture it – her father as the Ghost of Christmas past, and Emily the Ghost of Christmas Never-Meant-To-Be.
These days, spending the night of the 24th in a narrow twin bed at her mother’s house didn’t hold the same appeal it used to. While she loved being around her family, the truth was that waking up alone at the age of thirty five and fielding questions from her sisters-in-law about when she was going to settle down just saddened her. She wondered if she was the only person capable of feeling such crippling loneliness even in the midst of a loving family.
It depressed her to think that she would probably one day be as old as these women, with a mouth that looked like it’d sucked lemons, smelling like lilac powder and forced to wear fuschia lipstick and she’d still be alone.
A feeling of dread swamped over her. She thought it must have shown on her face, because Joy reached out to pat her hand sympathetically.
“You know what your problem is?” Merry stabbed the reflection of Joy in the mirror. “Your problem is you thought you were above the rest of us. You thought we were deficient in some way, and that you were going to be around forever, even though we told you that this is what he does. He just throws us away when someone new comes along.”
Fat tears fell off Joy’s jaws and dotted the breast of her lavender dress. She boo-hooed for close to a minute. Scully’s mouth dropped open a little. She was intensely curious almost despite herself.
“You mean you were all married to the same man?” she asked, turning to look at each of them in turn.
Carol sighed and leaned her blue helmet-hair back against the seat, closing her eyes. “Yes, dear. That’s our claim to fame.”
Scully’s lips formed the word “wow” but she never said it aloud.
“The worst part is that I used to feel important this time of year,” Joy said. “And now, we’re just useless.”
“Speak for yourself,” Merry said, scowling. “Carol and I do a lot of good for children in our area.”
“Oh, don’t be cross, I didn’t mean that,” Joy said. “I just mean it’s on such a smaller scale now.”
“Really though, Joy, you should be grateful.” Carol picked her head up off the headrest and turned to peer into the backseat. “At least we have each other.”
“Yeah,” Merry said, “You could be like Holly out in Colorado. Poor old bat is all alone out there.”
Scully blinked and shook her head. She couldn’t believe this. “Exactly how many ex-wives does this man have?”
Carol snorted. “Lord knows, honey. Let’s see… Noel was the first. I think I was the sixth. He’s on number eight now… as far as we know.”
She was so intent on their story, Scully barely noticed that they passed an exit without stopping. She vaguely determined to be more observant, and then turned back toward Joy.
“It’s none of my business,” she started, “but what exactly does…”
“He offer?” Carol interrupted. “Good question. I think it’s his charm.” She smiled a bit dreamily and smoothed her wrinkled hands over her hair.
“It was his charm,” Merry said sullenly. “That and he was good in the sack.”
“Merry!” Joy threw a glance toward Scully. “I don’t think this is something to talk about in front of the child.”
Scully couldn’t hold in a chuckle.
“And then there was his laugh,” Carol said, looking at Scully. “You’d never think anyone with that belly could be so cute. When he laughed it just shook like crazy.”
Scully laughed again. “Like a bowl full of jelly?” she asked with a grin. All of the women nodded and Carol let out a sigh.
“I know. It’s so cliche, but so true.”
A thousand questions were born and died before they made it to her lips. Wouldn’t that be a stupid thing to ask? Scully thought. Honestly, sometimes she surprised herself. Talk about a ridiculous question.
Carol twisted back around in her seat and looked out her window. “And now that I think about it, Merry is right, he was really good in bed.”
“Carol!” Joy exclaimed, horrified.
“Oh, don’t be such a prude,” Merry said, deftly maneuvering the car off at an exit ramp, “it’s not like she’s a kid.”
“I know, it’s just…she’s so nice, I don’t want to offend her.” Joy smiled over at Scully, who couldn’t help grinning back.
“I’m not at all offended.”
“She’s too nice,” Merry said, as she pulled up under the bright lights of a gas station and put the car in park. “Let me tell you, Dana, there are some of us who hope every year to see your name at the top of the naughty list.”
Carol let out a huge guffaw and even Joy started to giggle.
“Pardon?” Scully asked, not quite paying attention as she put her cell phone back in her overnight bag and started to zip it up. In the front seat Merry was talking in a low voice to Carol.
“Dana, honey, would you mind pumping the gas for us while we get the cash?” Carol asked, looking into the backseat.
“Of course not,” Scully unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the door, letting in a rush of cold air and a few soft snowflakes.
“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas,” Merry said, glancing up at a patch of sky.
Scully shut the door and went around to the gas tank. Inside the car, she could see the three women talking animatedly. Every few seconds Joy turned to look out the rear window and gave her a nervous smile. Scully smiled back. They were nice, but they sure were odd, to say the least. Fishing around in her pocket she realized all her money was in her overnight bag. She screwed the gas cap back on and opened the door again, sticking her head in.
“Don’t worry about paying,” she said, rifling through her bag, “I’ll get it.”
“Why how nice of you, dear.” Carol glanced at Merry.
“Jump in, Dana, and we’ll drive up to the door, you’re letting the cold air in,” Merry said.
Scully apologized and slid in, shutting the door behind her. She steadied herself by holding onto the bar that ran across the back of the driver’s seat, what her brothers had always called the “oh, shit,” bar, thanks to the fact that their father had had a habit of shouting that particular phrase when he took a curve too fast and they all had to hold on while her mother looked at her father with disapproval.
Merry started the car and put it into drive, fiddling for a moment with the radio dial until she picked up a station playing bland elevator-music holiday tunes. She hummed along, remarkably out of tune.
“Here, at least let us give you change for the phone since you were such a help with the gas,” Joy said. She reached out a cupped hand toward Scully and opened it, nickels and dimes showering from her fingers to the mat at Scully’s feet.
“Oh dear, I’m terribly sorry.”
Scully smiled and bent over to retrieve the money just as Merry gunned the engine and took off from the pump toward the gas station. Instinctively, Scully reached out and grabbed the bar to steady herself. Something cold clamped around her wrist and she sat up, still clutching a handful of coins. In bewilderment, she realized that Carol had handcuffed her left wrist and was smiling at her innocently. Before she had a chance to register what was happening, Carol snapped the other cuff around the ohshit bar.
“Is that how those work?” she asked.
“Yes,” Scully answered as they began coasting to a stop in front of the store, “that’s how they work. Hand me the key, Carol.” She tried to keep any note of irritation out of her voice. They were little old ladies, for goodness’ sake.
Everyone in the car seemed to be ignoring her. Merry opened her door and stuck a tentative foot out into the cold. “Be right back. Dana, can I get you anything?”
“No, thank you. I’ve got to call my partner anyway,” Scully said, nodding for Carol to take the cuffs off of her. Merry just shut the door and wandered inside while Carol turned back around in her seat and sat down.
“Carol,” Scully said brusquely, “would you let me out of the cuffs please? I need to call my partner.”
The silence in the car made her suddenly tense. With dawning comprehension, she turned to look at Joy, who turned her head and looked out into the cold night.
“No, you don’t understand,” Scully said. “I have to get out here.”
Joy turned to look at her as Merry returned to the car and put it in reverse. “Don’t worry!” she said, patting Scully’s shoulder. The fear that rose in Scully’s throat was quickly replaced by righteous anger. When she spoke her voice was full of venom.
“I am a Federal Officer, let me out immediately.”
Joy began sniffing again. “I wish you wouldn’t sound so mad, Dana. We’re not going to hurt you.”
Scully pulled desperately on the cuffs, causing the driver’s seat to shake back and forth wildly as they accelerated out of the station.
“Do you mind, Dana? I can’t see the road when you do that,” Merry said.
“WHAT is going on here? I said to let me out, NOW.”
Carol finally peered back over her shoulder. She looked faintly sick, as though she were feeling guilty.
“Dana, honey,” she began, “bear with us. We’re just trying to cheer Joy up. She’s so depressed, she needs to do something important this Christmas and granting this wish is the only big thing we can think of. The toys for kids just aren’t doing it for her anymore.”
“Listen,” Scully began, lowering the tone of her voice so that she sounded as stern as possible. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but you must let me go right now. This is a Federal Offense. I’m an FBI Agent, and I assure you there are going to be serious consequences if you don’t let me out of these handcuffs and this car immediately.”
Nobody answered her. She wondered if they even understood what they were doing. With an effort, she decided to go for a calmer approach. At least keep them talking to her. If her work with Mulder had taught her anything over the years, it was the value of occasionally playing along with the deluded or confused. She’d been practicing it on him for years.
“Where are we going?”
The thread of silence unspooled in the car as they pulled back out onto the highway. The car’s console lights illuminated the faces of her three ancient kidnappers, who all sat staring out the front window. The only sound was the occasional sniff that Joy tried to stifle in her tissue. Despite what Merry and Carol said, she didn’t appear to be cheered up. In fact, it looked like Scully’s unhappiness with the situation was making her even more miserable.
“Let me out,” Scully said loudly, “I want you to let me out so I can go home for Christmas.” She hoped her appeal on behalf of the holiday season might work, but Merry and Carol just smiled slightly out the front window as snow began to fall in earnest. Joy wept openly then appeared to be jolted from her silence.
“Oh dear, Dana, it’s not what you think. It’s just that we so rarely get to grant big wishes these days. Bloody Kris gets all the glory, and we’re left doing the little things that nobody notices.”
“Kris?” Scully asked. She knew what was coming next, could feel it in her bones. She resigned herself to it.
“Kringle,” Joy admitted. “You know…St. Nick…Santa Claus?”
“He’s definitely not a saint,” Merry muttered.
Scully flopped her head against the cold window glass and shut her eyes in irritation. Great, just great – she’d managed to hitch a ride with three psycho little old ladies. Wait until Mulder found out. He’d never let her live this down.
“We’re not crazy, Dana,” Carol said. Scully didn’t even bother opening her eyes.
“Oh, don’t bother, you two,” Merry said. “You know how skeptical she is.”
It was ridiculous. Scully felt almost sad for them. These women were clearly deranged, and while she didn’t think they would ever hurt her, they were ruining her chances of getting home for Christmas with every mile they drove. Despite her current Grinch-like tendencies, she felt duty-bound to show up at her mother’s, if only to prove to her family that she was capable of acting happy for a little while.
The window began fogging up as she leaned against it, furiously planning her escape. Eventually, someone was going to have to go to the bathroom, not the least of all herself, and then she was getting out of this situation. She didn’t particularly relish the idea of physically harming any of the women, but one way or the other she was getting free, even if she had to yank out the seat to do it.
In preparation, she began going over their earlier conversation. She felt nauseated realizing the women had been talking about sex with Santa Claus earlier. Oh, why did she have to remember that? Talk about revolting. It was enough to make anyone lose the holiday spirit. Not that she had much of that to begin with.
Scully lifted her head from the window when she felt the texture of The road change. Merry had decelerated and pulled off the highway onto a one-lane road. With effort, Scully managed to keep from asking where they were going. Joy looked over at her nervously, and Scully just turned a cold gaze toward her. Snow was beginning to stick to the trees. Around her, a few scattered houses were lit up with plastic snowmen or strings of lights. Eventually, the homes became fewer and fewer, and the car began plodding up a steep hill into a forest. The road wound around so tightly that Carol cracked her window a bit for some fresh air. “All these circles are making me sick,” she apologized. “And that smoke.”
Merry jammed her cigarette stub into the overflowing ashtray and released a huffy breath. “Now that we’re almost there, Dana, I just think you should know that those toy store thefts are perfectly explainable.”
Scully inserted as much boredom into her voice as she could to mask her curiosity.
“You robbed the stores I was investigating too? You three really get around.”
“Well, honey, not us exactly, ” Carol added, “but some friends of ours. You have no idea how difficult it is to get toy donations for all the needy children this time of year. Besides, the stores have insurance.”
“Robbery and kidnapping. Nice.”
Merry laughed loudly. “Just you wait, Dana. We’re not the loony tunes you think we are.”
Scully said nothing, but sat back and waited, jerking on the handcuffs and wiggling the seat. Merry rolled her eyes.
The air got colder as they climbed. After every twisting curve the snow became deeper, until finally they pulled off the blacktop onto a gravel road. Through the trees, Scully made out a small cabin, lit up with tiny colored lights. In the front window, a Christmas tree glowed. Merry pulled to a stop out front and pushed on the horn, which beeped the first verse of Jingle Bells.
Carol tossed Joy the key to the cuffs.
“Thank goodness we’re finally here,” Joy said as she began unlocking them.
“Where is here?”
Joy nodded out the window and Scully turned to look. In the light of the open door she saw Mulder, who was putting on shoes and coming out to meet the car.
With a click she was undone. She opened the door, bolting out as relief spread through her.
“Mulder, what are you doing here?” she asked, jogging toward him.
“Isn’t that my line? What are you doing here? I thought you were heading home.”
She didn’t stop moving until she was right next to him. All her earlier irritation seemed to vaporize in the cool air and she just shook her head and searched for an explanation. He watched her for a moment with concern, then put his hand out to touch the side of her face.
“Wait, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”
She leaned into his warm hand. “Yeah. My car broke down. These women picked me up. I…” she stopped, unsure how to even begin telling him what had happened. To hell with it, she thought, and gave up. Pulling away from his hand she glanced from him to the cabin, a question written on her face.
“Nice digs. Hope I’m not interrupting your holiday.”
Mulder snorted. “Yeah, right, Scully. The only motel in town was overbooked so one of the toy store owners told me I could stay out here. He rents these out for the holidays,” Mulder explained as yet another honking version of Jingle Bells disrupted the silent night.
Merry rolled down the driver’s window and Carol leaned over to yell out. “Dana, honey, come here a second, would you?”
Scully glanced up at Mulder, then made her way slowly back toward the car. She didn’t quite know what to say. There didn’t seem to be a really appropriate comment for the “yes, you helped me, then kidnapped me, but took me safely to my partner – why, for what reason I don’t know, since I was calling him anyway,” scenario. But they were old, so she imagined she owed them some sort of indulgence. For the moment she wasn’t even going to consider how they knew where to find him.
She opened the back door and leaned her head in, careful not to move in too far, lest they decide to take off again.
“See there,” Joy said happily, “I told you we weren’t going to hurt you!”
“Why did you do this?”
“Good grief.” Merry shook her head. “We told you ten times – to fulfill a Christmas wish. “
“Wait. I don’t understand. This is Mulder’s Christmas wish?”
“Oh, no. Well…probably,” Carol said, glancing out to where he stood in the yard. “But we can’t really tell people’s wishes unless we get near them.”
“So this is your wish?” Scully looked around at the three.
Merry just sighed with exasperation and Carol slapped her knee and began laughing.
“No, Dana. It’s yours,” Joy said, shaking her head as though Scully was a trifle slow.
Scully didn’t know what to say. She just narrowed her eyes and stood for a moment, taking it all in.
“But…”
She didn’t get any further. All three women sat staring at her, their wrinkled cheeks drawn up in grins. With an effort, she turned and shut the door behind her before walking back toward her partner. He glanced down at her empty hands.
“Don’t you have a bag?”
She shook herself out of her reverie and nodded. “Yeah, it’s in the car.”
Mulder went to retrieve it. She could hear him thanking the ladies and joking with them. She watched him as he came back toward her. The snow was sticking to his hair and his dark sweater was white with it. Turning, they walked toward the cabin.
“DANA!” Joy shouted.
Scully turned and looked apologetically up at Mulder before she walked toward the car again. He grinned and sauntered into the cabin, leaving the door open behind him.
Joy rolled down the rear window.
“Here,” she held her hand out to Scully. “When he came to get your bag we figured out his wish!”
With a smile, Joy punched the button and rolled the window back up, but not before Scully heard them all laughing hysterically inside. With a wave, Merry pulled off down the driveway and they disappeared into the night.
“Hey, you coming in?” Mulder called from the doorway.
Finally managing a tiny smile, she turned and walked toward his shadowy outline.
The handcuffs swung from her grip.
~ ❄ ~
Christmas Morning
2:14 a.m.
The fax machine in the corner of the kitchen started receiving a message. Merry, cursed with insomnia, walked toward it. With a cackle of glee she grabbed the piece of paper and stuck it to the center of the fridge with a candy cane magnet.
“Naughty List: Amendment – Addition: Dana Katherine Scully – 12/25/99”
~ ❄ ~
End
Author’s Notes: Okay, I know this doesn’t jibe with the idea that M&S shared their first kiss on New Year’s Eve, but I figured if you could suspend disbelief long enough to read about Scully being kidnapped by Santa’s ex-wives, you probably wouldn’t care. <g>
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