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Interlude by Moon
From: Mooncombo <[email protected]> Date: 13 Apr 1999 15:58:00 GMT Subject: NEW: Interlude NC-17 (1 of 3)
Hi folks. this is a angsty-fluff piece wrtitten for my own amusement. Okay to archive anywhere-just let me know where.
Rating: NC-17 (for sexual content and slight hints of sexual violence) Disclaimer: They aren’t mine, they belong to 10/13 and Chris Carter. Comments please at [email protected]
ON with the show…
Interlude by Moon
God, she’s beautiful, I think to myself. I want to reach out and touch her. I’m in awe of her. Her lips curved slightly in that patented Scully-way. Not a smile, but there is a definite curve. Her eyes are at half-mast, unfocused. She slowly lets her head drop to gaze at the glass in her hand.
“I don’t think I should drink any more.” Her words are slightly slurred. She changes her focus to me. “Take me home, Mulder.” Her wish is my command.
I stand and move to help her with her coat. She is slightly off-balance and rests against me for a minute before regaining her composure. I watch in amusement as she lifts her chin and straightens her shoulders, trying to gain some semblance of control.
I lean down and whisper sarcastically into her ear, “Tough as nails.” She stops, directly in front of me. Slowly she turns around and stares straight into my eye, lifts one eyebrow, and then graciously completes her circle and heads for the door.
I tell myself not to goad her. The last thing she needs is to be antagonized by her lunatic of a partner. The same man responsible for her alcoholic binge. I quickly follow her out the door.
As we get closer to my car, she stops, throws her head back, and examines the stars. “So beautiful,” she whispers, her voice dripping with an emotion undecipherable to me, yet vaguely resembling longing.
“Mulder, have you ever wanted to make love under the stars? I guess that’s a stupid question, you’ve probably already done that.” Her voice now hints at bitterness.
“Scully, are you coming on to me?” I try to lighten the mood with some humor. The stare she pins on me tells me I failed miserably. I try to soften my expression and whisper, “Hey, Scully, let me take you home. Whatever the problem is, we’ll work on it together.”
Again she gives me that strange look, only this time it is definitely laced with sadness.
My head is feels as though it is filled with cotton. Mulder unlocks the passenger door and helps me into the car. I give him a look of what I hope is gratitude. He nods slightly and shuts the door.
The ride to my apartment is silent. We’re both lost in our own thought. Often, I am grateful for our comfortable silences. I hate trying to think of idle chatter. I’m not sure what came over me tonight. I almost laughed at Mulder’s expression when I asked him if he wanted to go and get a drink. Surely the “ice-queen” doesn’t drink! If only people knew. If only they knew the road I had to take to become the person I am.
Who am I kidding? Mulder knows the truth. He has probably guessed by now that his inebriated partner is trying to hide from herself. I have actually done this to him before. There were times in the past when I have gotten drunk just so that I could be honest with him. Liquid courage. It becomes so much easier with heat running through your veins to let yourself go. Sometimes it seems it would be easy to be an alcoholic.
Of course, that is not so in my case. As it is, I rarely touch the stuff. Too mind-numbing. Such a catch twenty-two. I sense Mulder glancing at me. He is concerned. I really shouldn’t do this to him. I shouldn’t put him in this position. Especially when I don’t have all of my wits about me.
It doesn’t matter, we’ve come too far to hold back, now. He knows it and I know it. Both of us have been careful not to broach the topic for so long that it seems as though we have each created a fantasy world, complete with a safety net. We can’t be harmed in our minds, but what happens when fantasy becomes reality?
I wish I could read her mind. Deep down I sense what is happening, but I have to be careful to let her come to her own decision. She struggles. What a situation we have created for ourselves. What a situation I have created for her. Our own private hell. How romantic.
We spend our days looking out among the busy people on the streets. These people rushing home to their families and loved ones. We have fallen so far into the abyss of our work that sane, normal life is impossible for us to achieve. We can never hope to conduct ourselves even at the basic levels of normalcy. We only have one another and yet, each of us represents the forbidden fruit to the other.
She loves me and I love her, but the love we share is so incredibly different from that detailed in a cheap romance novel. I would die for her and she for me.
I feel different tonight. It’s something that I can’t quite articulate, but I know that she feels it as well.
I pull up to her apartment building and turn the key in the ignition. Without the motor running, the silence becomes thick, uneasy. I don’t look at her, but steal a glance at her hands, which she in turn is staring at.
A few minutes pass before she looks at me, her eyes glittering strangely. She turns away and whispers so quietly, that I must strain to catch her words, “Come up with me.”
I don’t answer right away. The silence grows thicker. A thousand reasons why we shouldn’t do this race through my mind, but my dominant thought is, “Yes.”
We get out of the car and I follow her upstairs. My heart is beating so hard in my chest, that I can barely hear anything else. Suddenly, I am more afraid than I have ever been in my entire life. What will tomorrow bring?
I was so certain ten minutes ago that I wanted this, now I find myself almost paralyzed by uncertainty. This will change everything. I continue to march up the stairs and down the hallway. I unlock my door and pause briefly before stepping through the threshold. The silence is deafening and I am afraid to turn around to see if Mulder is still behind me. I feel his hand on my shoulder, and I drop my head down in relief.
I know he must be scared, too, and that is a small comfort. I slowly turn around to face him. So much to say and yet, there really is no need. We know each other so well, that sexual intimacy is the only barrier left between us. I look into his eyes, really look. His eyes tell me all I need to know. There is nothing to discuss. He knows it, I know it.
I reach up and touch my fingers to his cheek. That one move broke any resistance left between us. He leans down and gently touches his lips to mine. A low moan escapes from deep in my throat. I open my mouth just a fraction and he traced my lower lip with his tongue. He deepens the kiss. His tongue duels with mine. The kiss turns more urgent and demanding. Suddenly, we are all over each other, frantic with need. I have wanted this for so long and it feels as incredible as I thought that it would.
I am overwhelmed by my need for this woman. I typically lust after tall leggy blondes, but this woman is the most magnificent creature to me. She’s tiny and delicate. Her hair, a crown of fire. Our kiss is raging out of control. At this rate, we’ll be done very shortly and I want this to last. Oh God, I want this to last. I gently push her an arm’s length away from me keeping my hands on her shoulders. I catch her eye and hold it. I have never been this connected to another person in my entire life.
I reach down and take her small hand in mine and lead her to the bedroom. I turn on the light and notice the candle and book of matches on the nightstand. I carefully light the candle and move to turn off the light. Scully has not moved from the spot I left her. She is uncertain, and uneasy.
I understand. She guards herself much more so than I do. I have had many more sexual experiences than Scully has. They weren’t particularly fulfilling, but certainly pleasurable. I have sensed that Scully has been traumatized in the past due to a bad sexual encounter, but I have never prodded her to tell me about it. I simply know that the demon lurks in the back of her mind. She knows that I have realized this and she will tell about it when she is ready. Until that time I will move slowly and not rush her.
I am suddenly very insure of myself. Mulder seems to know what to do. I realize that I’m not as experienced as he is. I’m not sure anyone has ever made love to me before. Oh sure, I’ve had sex, but nothing as intense or as intimate as that single kiss from Mulder. This may be too much for me. He’s too close. I can’t keep hiding from him. He knows. He knows my secrets, even the ones I haven’t told him. Even though it scares me, I find comfort in that fact.
I shut my eyes for a brief moment to gain my composure. This is Mulder. He’d never hurt me and this will be wonderful, I keep telling myself.
“Come here, Dana.” I open my eyes and he is sitting on the edge of the bed. I slowly walk over to him. And stand between his legs. He takes my hands in his and says quietly, “I know you.”
I look at him and answer, “I know you do, and that scares me.”
Regardless, I take the initiative and kiss him. The room is dark, save for the flickering light from the candle. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. I bury my face in his neck. His hands are roaming up and down my spine. I feel such an aching need, that I am overwhelmed. I feel my eyes start to burn with tears. I blink rapidly, but the drops seep out from beneath my closed eyes.
I have wanted to feel this for so long, that reality comes crashing down around me in full force. So few people have the bond that Mulder and I share. Only in sharing the deepest of agonies can two people become this close. The swirling emotions in my mind have calmed and funneled themselves into one startling realization: Our pain has brought us to this moment. The word “normal” does not register in our brains.
We shouldn’t be doing this. It goes against everything we know, but it is all we have left.
I can feel the wetness of her tears on my neck. So much has been bottled inside of this small woman. I can admit that I have been very selfish at times in my dealings with her. Sometimes I am unable to acknowledge her pain. But I always sense her emotions, even if I can’t give her the support she needs.
I often blame myself for the extent of troubles. I know I have been the cause of a good portion of it, but I also know that many of those demons existed before I met her. She is so guarded. The wall of armor that has protected her so many times, is almost as transparent as glass to me now.
I gently tip her chin up, so I can see her face. She desperately looks away and blinks rapidly, trying to keep the tears at bay. She is breaking my heart.
I say the only words that can give her comfort, “I know, Scully. Just let it go.” She nods slightly, relieved. She feels as though she needs to explain things to me. Things that I should know before we cross the line. She keeps hesitating, as though I haven’t already figured her demons out.
“There is nothing left to tell me, Scully, that I don’t already know. Trust me. We’ll move slowly.” She lets out her breath in a sigh.
“I trust you.”
He pulls me into his lap and slowly lays back on the bed with me cradled in his arms. He traces his finger across my collar bone. He leans down to kiss me once more. The kiss is exquisite. His fingers roam lower and he caresses the entire front of my body with the palm of his hand in lazy, swirling patterns. So achingly slow and light.
I reach up and thread my fingers through his hair, drawing his head down for a deeper kiss. He rolls over onto his back, pulling me with him, so that I am straddling his hips. I can’t help but feel his erection, incredibly hard, through his jeans. Before I can think to keep myself in check, my eyes, wide as saucers, frantically search out his. Get control of yourself, Dana. This is Mulder, everything is fine. Quickly, I divert my eyes to his chest, but not before I catch his look of complete understanding.
“We’ll move at your pace, Scully.” He tries to cover his compassion by adding, “I am at your mercy.” He gives me a lopsided grin. I sit up and let Mulder undo the buttons on my blouse. He slowly eases the blouse off of my shoulders. His hand gently caresses my nipple through the silky fabric of my bra.
My body is acting on it’s own accord. I feel strangely uninhibited. I allow myself to feel sensation. Rational thought usually keeps me on path, but tonight it is so easy to let it go. I drop my head back, allowing a whimper to escape my lips.
“Let go, Dana, just let go.” Suddenly I feel as though a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I really can let go and I do just that. Slowly, I rock my hips against his. He reaches up to release the clasp of my bra, sliding it down my arms. I steal a glance at him.
“God, you’re perfect.” I sit up once more and take his hands in mine., pulling him to a sitting position, with me in his lap. I grab the hem of his t-shirt and pull it over his head. I push him back on to the bed. I lean down and circle his nipples with my tongue. He groans.
I work my way lower, kissing a trail down his stomach, stopping at the buckle of his belt.
Scully pauses briefly and looks up at me, uncertain. I nod slightly. She continues her mission. She struggles with the buckle of my belt, then works the button and zipper of my jeans. I suck in my breath. God, this is really happening. She caresses me and I can’t help but jerk involuntarily.
I roll out from under her and pull my pants off, leaving my boxers in place. We need to slow this down. I climb back on to the bed and position my self between Scully’s bent legs. She still has her pants on and I look down at her with adoration. I rub a path from her knees to her inner thighs and back. She squirms beneath my touch.
I move to cup her gently. I can feel the heat coming from her, even with her slacks still in place. I lightly stroke her up and down. She whimpers and it is music to my ears.
“Mulder..,” she sputters. I don’t lose my pace. I reach for her pants and quickly rid her of this barrier. She is lying before me, her face flushed, wearing a skimpy pair of black lace panties. Once more, I reach down and caress her through the fabric. She is so hot. I slide my finger along the elastic at her hip following it down to her inner thigh and then slipping it under to stroke the wetness between her thighs.
My little Scully is tossing her head back and forth. I explore further and find the tight bundle of nerves of her clitoris. Ever so slowly, I stroke the fire starting to burn within her. She rewards me by arching her back and lifting her hips off the mattress.
“Oh, God, Mulder, I…I..can’t..”
“Let go, Scully, let it happen.”
She is fighting the loss of control, even though I know she needs this as badly as I do. I increase my tempo. Her breath is coming out in short gasps. She is so close.
“I..uh…Mul…der…I…” “Don’t think, Dana, just feel.”
“I want…”
“Yes, tell me what you want.”
“I….want…this…” She throws her head back and lets out a tiny sob. I can feel the tremors wracking her tiny frame. I wrap my arms tightly around her and hold her until she can regain her precious control.
Her breathing has slowed. I roll her onto her stomach and kiss her shoulders. She shivers. I reach down and pull the lace panties from her body, then smooth my hand over her calf, up her thigh, over her ass, and finally up her spine. I continue my exploration, noticing the tiny birthmark on the back of her right thigh. Her ass is perfect. I trace the snake tattooed on her lower back, biting its own tail with my finger. I could do this all night, but Scully grows impatient and flips over onto her back. She looks up at me, with hazy eyes, touches my cheek, then pushes me onto my back.
I suddenly feel bold as I push Mulder down into the mattress. He lets me take back a slight measure of control. Everything I need to see is playing across his face. He purposely keeps his moves unthreatening and passive. He knows me.
I reach down for the elastic of his boxers and slowly drag them off of his hips and down his legs to be discarded with the rest of the clothing on the floor. He is naked. I can’t help but panic slightly at the size of his erection. I hope he doesn’t rip me in half.
My confidence scatters just as quickly as it had appeared. I sit perched on the end of the bed by his feet. Fear ripples through me. I feel like a trapped deer. What will he see? What does he know?
Slowly, I let my eyes find his, my eyes a mirror into my mind. I hold my hands out, palms face up, in a helpless gesture. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have the wealth of romantic interludes that Mulder has from which to draw forth some erotic move. My sexual encounters have been empty, sometimes painful, once borderline brutal. The scars run deep and I can’t shake them at this moment, even with Mulder.
What does he know? Everything. He takes my hands and pulls me toward him and sets me atop of him. I straddle his thighs and he whispers, ” You are in control, Dana, I won’t take that away from you.”
Momentarily relieved, I lean down and brush my lips against his. I deepen the kiss and suddenly, I let myself go. I feel almost frantic as I attempt to devour him. My hands need to touch him everywhere. I can feel his hardness pressing at my core. I rock against him, groaning into his mouth. God, I can feel my self becoming incredibly wet. I rub my clit against his cock and electric shivers race through my entire body.
I can’t take this torture much longer. She is so hot and wet above me. I want to bury myself within her, but I wait. If I rush, her brittle trust in our intimacy will be crushed. She slides her body against mine. She whimpers. She opens her eyes and looks directly into mine as she positions herself to take me into her tiny body.
I reach around her to steady my cock as she allows it entrance. Tight, God she is so tight. She pushes herself down on me. A sharp intake of breath, followed by a shudder She holds herself deathly still. The look in her eyes in unmistakable. Pain. I am stretching her to the point of pain. A tiny sob slips out from between her teeth.
” Relax, Scully, we can stop any time you want.”
She violently shakes her head. “No, I want this to happen.” She forces herself all the way down. Her breathing is erratic, but I feel her begin to relax her body..She is regaining her control. After a minute, she begins to rock. She moves easily with me buried deep inside of her. A look of relief crosses her face.
“It’s just been so long,” she tries to offer up as an explanation. She’s not entirely being truthful, but I let it slide. Her demons are still in residence.
I am growing even harder as she quickens her pace. She sit up and throws her head back, moaning slightly. I reach up and gently brush the tight nerves of her clit. She rewards me by gasping. She is close. All of her reservations are gone. She is moving faster and faster toward her release, while I try to hold back.
I want her to know the pleasure of an internal orgasm before I come.
I’m so close. The pressure is building. Every nerve feels alive. I always knew there would be tenderness between us the first time, but I hadn’t counted in the raw passion that is taking over. I feel reckless and shameless as my tempo increases. I slam myself forcefully into his body. I am almost there. I need this. I grit my teeth and throw my head back, only to immediately drop it forward and pin Mulder with a look of absolute wanton abandonment. His eyes are beginning to glaze over and I can see that he is close as well.
His hands are frantically stroking my arms, my back, my ass, every part of my body that he can touch. He groans. I bite my lip.
We are one now, soaring toward a release.
I can’t hold out any longer. Her body his beginning to shake from the orgasm building from deep inside of her core.
I can feel his erection ready to burst deep inside of me.
“Oh, God, Scully”
I can feel her muscles tightening.
I can feel him explode within me a split second for I am consumed my the ripples of pleasure flooding my body.
He groans.
She shudders.
I am still inside of her. She has collapsed on my chest, breathing heavily.
I am slowly becoming aware of my surroundings. Mulder’s chest hair tickles my nose.
Exhaustion is beginning to consume me. I slowly withdraw myself from her slick body.
I am so tired I can’t think rationally. All I am aware of his Mulder’s arms cradling me against his body. I am content as I have never been.
I gently place a kiss on Scully’s temple. She has fallen asleep, curled in my arms. I am home.
Comments? E-mail me at [email protected] Thanks for reading.
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